Drained

I am so tired. Emotionally, physically, mentally. I am so tired of thinking about everything. I'm so tired of being miserable. I am so tired of crying. My eyes is permanently in a swollen and sleepy looking state with horrendous puffiness all the time.

All that mattered has past. And I was able to overcome it. That's all that matter to me.

I want to leave all these sadness behind. I am sick of explaining myself and not getting the understanding that I need. I am sick of having to be disappointed because of my own expectations.

So please.
Just leave me alone if at the end of the day you don't care.
Just leave me alone if you are only doing this out of courtesy.
Just leave me alone if you think that I am being unreasonable or petty or just difficult to understand.
Just leave me alone if you don't understand how I truly feel.
All of you, just leave me alone.

All these hurt inside me will be not be forgotten but I will move on from it. I don't want to live in this misery all the time, be consumed by it and be affected by it every single day.

I will still be here. But don't expect me to share anymore. I can't. The loneliness I felt after I did, I just can't do it anymore. I've learnt my lesson and I won't do it again.

On a side note, I tear up so easily nowadays it scares me how emotional I've become. I can't be like this anymore. I miss the strong me.

xx